user
25 Nov 2017 . 1 min read

How To Have Difficult Conversations With Your Parents: Mujhe Shaadi Nahi Karni Edition


Share the Article :

https://img.sheroes.in/img/default_img.jpg https://img.sheroes.in/img/default_img.jpg

Tip: Don’t start with “Mujhe shaadi nahi karni

Assuming that your parents are important to you and that you do want them to be happy, it might be best to sit down with them and have a serious talk. Explain that you agree with them that marriage is important, but you want to wait right now and take your time. 

If you and your parents come from a culture where they are expected to play a part in the search for your life partner, then share what you're looking for and what matters to you. Emphasize that you want to get to know the person first because you want to be sure that you truly are compatible before you complicate matters with sex (which marriage inevitably does) or dating.

Read: What questions should you ask from boy before arranged marriage?

Then allow them to express their concerns and point of view. Listen to these concerns with undivided attention and don’t rebut them until they’ve expressed all of them. Then, thank them for their suggestions and address only those issues that they’ve gotten completely wrong. Tackle only those that create misinterpretation of who you are and whom do you want to be with.

Golden Tip - Do yourself a favour and stay away from words like, “You’re wrong.” Are we clear on that? Good and don’t blame them. They only want the best for you, right? (If they don’t, that’s a whole different issue altogether).

If they’re critical of you being picky, point out that marriage is a long time to be miserable together and remind them that you’re the kind of person who takes time and tries something out before taking a decision. You are, aren’t you? Or you’d be married already.

Here is an open letter from a daughter to Indian Parents.

They may have made their marriage work on the fly, but you do things differently and that’s okay too. This might need some time for it to sink in, so don't be too disappointed if they don't react the way you hope, immediately. But they’ll eventually understand and accept this. Isn’t that all you want - some time and kindness?


15011875311501187531

Explore more on SHEROES

Share the Article :

Responses

  • *****
    My whatsapp number 8130280319
  • *****
    Hii
  • M*****
    Ya true , I'm 31 nd like every parents my parents also wants me to marry , but till date I didn't find the right guy . According to them every boy is good for me . Now I'm so frustrated that I don't want to meet anybody or don't want to marry , but they are not agree with my view.
  • R*****
    One of my lecturer didn't marry up to her 40s, but she is at top of the position,where anyone want to go. Whatever may be your decision, first you should stand for yourself, then ultimately society n parents agreed on your decision. Moreover Marriage is not the aim of our life. Even after marriage you have many bound's around you. You can't even take a single decision without thinking of everyone's feeling
  • P*****
    Marriage is a part of our life... I got married at 23. My parents had some plan n all bt ultimately it was my decision.. Bt sometimes i feel i should take lil more time for me.. Bt ya i m happily married... So wen u want that time only u should get marry.. Ur life Ur decision Ur choice.. Just remind one thing dont loose Ur self respect and dont allow anyone to drive ur life.. I m not telling ki dont respect ur hubby or jst ignore his word.. No... Listen everything .. He is ur well wisher.. Our parents r our well wisher.. Bt at the end u should take the right decision.. Marriage is not a bad thing. .. It's a very sweet relationship..
  • K*****
    I think shadi karni chahiye not bcz we r women jst bcz 4r our parents qki unhe hmse v kuch umide rehti for mrg wo v chahte h meri beti ka apna pariwar ho apna wajud ho or unhe koi nana nani keh k bulaye Main ye nhi kehti ki huby k naam k sath hi sab kuch hota h Nhi Bilkul nhi But shadi jaruri h hmme apna dukh sukh pyar or v bahot share krne k liye... Apne pair stand lekr mrg kro ya jst study k bad pati to pati hi rahenge
  • R*****
    Aur kisiko kabhi shadi naahi karni ho to kya kare
  • R*****
    Right
  • N*****
    Marriage is very important part of ur life... N parents hmari bhala hi chahte h hmesa... They wants ki HM entire life happy rhe . That's why vo shadi k lie force krte h ki HMe ek supportive life partner mil jae.. bt shadi nhi krni h to tell him that u r not against of marriage bt u want to become independent n sure they will understand...
  • P*****
    Yes hr koyi aapni jagha shi h pr sadhi tb karo jab man ho agar abi man nhi h to kabi mt karo... Sadhi v life me jaruri h or ek time k bad to aapni family hi achi lagti h aapna husband jo aapka dhan rakhe aapke bache jo aapko hi dusra rup hote he mano to aapka bachapan fir se jene ka ek chance dete h.. Pr jab in sab ka man ho tb hi krni chaiye.. Its My opinion
  • D*****
    No, pooja that's not right.shaadi hi sab kuch nhi hai .Kisi ke bhi parents galat nhi kar sakte apni beti ke liye. But shaadi se pahle ladki ko ye fix kar lena chahiye ki shaadi ke baad job karna ya nhi karna uska faisla hoga. In my opinion woman ko kuch to jaroor karna chahiye ,sirf homemaker hi ban kar nhi rahna chahiye.
  • B*****
    For parents daughter's marriage is a security once they die.fine u don't want to marry.try to make them understand why and see marriage from ur point of view.
  • R*****
    See first you must have logic point why you don't want to get marry. Then attain that position n status in the society in your career in which you have full confidence for yourself
  • S*****
    No its ur life..u can decide
  • P*****
    Mujhe b shadi krne ka mn n krta pr aisa lgta h shadi k siva option hi n h... Ek ldki k liye uska carriyr ya kuch b sb kuch shadi k bad hi shuru hota h
  • P*****
    Yhi to rona h,
  • B*****
    Yes u r right nehq
  • N*****
    Marriage is the final step after your carrier and self dependence. Don't miss any step else you will surely fall.
  • P*****
    ??