How Do I Let Go?
As life keeps donning its various ‘add ons’, in the form of new experiences, new chapters, we realize that not all of these flavours leave a sweet taste in our mouth.
We learn the tough lessons of life through making mistakes, and at times, even though being the nicer person and not making any mistakes.
Through all of these bittersweet experiences, the only thing central to our growth is ‘letting go’, of things that do not matter, things that weigh us down, things that bind us and become a hindrance to our growth.
As always, it is easier said than done. When we speak of letting go, it always sounds like an abstract concept.
How does one let go, where does one even begin to let go, really? The beginning is always the toughest, and letting go always begins with acceptance.
Acceptance, once again, doesn’t come easy. We are stuck in a whirlpool of questions trying to understand why what happened, happened.
Those questions however, don’t do us any good and more often than not pull us down with them. Very often, we put ourselves at the centre of those questions, for example, ‘why me?’
These questions often lead us to viewing the situation as a reflection of who we are, or in other words, judging ourselves (often harshly), for what happened. Remind yourself to not ‘blame’ yourself, or for that matter anyone else. Just accept it, and make peace.
One method that has worked very well for me, every time I have been through a rough patch, is writing. To just put it all down on paper, and leave it there.
To make the pain and the suffering tangible, but also to try and distance myself from it, because it is important to let go.
The writing does not need to be grammatically correct, a work of art, or even legible! Write just for the sake of it. No one but you will ever read it, unless you want it to be otherwise. There is something incredibly therapeutic about writing. About words coming together to form sentences which reflect your state of mind, and a pair of eyes reading them and understanding objectively about what the next step ought to be. The pair of eyes being none others than yours.
Before you can expect to gain closure, you must first go through the motions of coming full circle in your acceptance of yourself, and your situation and the circumstances.
In your acceptance, you find your closure. And one day, it will all make sense. Not because it all adds up, but because you have allowed yourself to ‘let go’ and move freely and consciously towards being the person you are growing into. Because, you understand now that by ‘letting go’, you don’t forfeit your strength but allow yourself to reclaim it.
Let go, a little bit, every day; and find the pieces of yourself you felt you lost, only to realize you have lost nothing. All you’ve become is a stronger, better person.