Ask The LoveDoctor
Dear LoveDoctor: I Get Anxiety When Making Decisions
Dear LoveDoctor -
I just don't know why I avoid making decisions. The very thought of making decision scares me. I began thinking of what if it goes wrong. I feel that if I take a decision and it goes wrong, it will not only affect me but my family. I am currently trying to find my passions and really having trouble because I don’t want to choose!
Let me ask you a question. What taught you more lessons - doing things right the first time, or doing things wrong?
Mistakes are lessons, and lessons are blessings. The world doesn't end when one makes a mistake. Even as babies we learn through making mistakes - we touch a hot stove, we fall ... if mistakes were that bad then how would you be alive :) Think of all the mistakes you have ever made and here you are, still standing.
And - you are doing things to give yourself a more juicy life like exploring your passions. So, you're not making all bad decisions - some of your decisions are wonderful.
What it sounds like you have is anxiety. And anxiety can be dealt with by quieting the mind. When you have a thought ask - is this true?
More than likely you are getting into a spiral without really stopping yourself to question the thoughts. NOT ALL THOUGHTS ARE TRUE!
Before you make a decision - when you feel that anxiety bubble up - stop, breathe, and tell yourself - I only make decisions for my highest and best good. And trust that. Keep moving forward.
No matter what - you move forward. If it's wrong, you learn and change course. If it's right you celebrate - but you ALWAYS get to where you need to be. Trust that.