Last updated 25 Jan 2018 . 5 min read

What To Say When Kids Ask Tough Questions

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Mom, where did I come from?

How did the baby go inside your belly?

What is death?

Why is my body different from my sister’s body?

These are the questions that intrigue the minds of children very often.

As parents, our job is to protect, provide, care, and, cuddle. But things may become challenging once your children start growing up. The more they grow, the more curious they get. The moment they learn to speak, frame sentences and ask questions, you must upgrade to version 2.0, i.e the next level of parenting.

You need to be a philosopher, a teacher, and a learner at times.

Some months back, you were never short of words, but now your own children leave you speechless with an awkward expression.

Kids are inquisitive, they ask questions so frequently as they process whatever they see and hear. This is a good quality though.

At times, you’ll exclaim,

Oh! My child is such a curious observer.

But, at times,

Oh Shit! How am I supposed to answer this?

We understand your situation. Here’s a list of important factors to consider while answering those sorts of questions.

Follow these tips to answer the awkward or intricate questions of your tiny tots –

#1 Don’t Ignore, Answer

Most of you often make this mistake. Avoid using phrases like, will talk later or I have some work for now or it’s not your concern, ignore!

The act of ignoring won’t let the child’s mind skip the query. They might reach out to other people which may not be safe. If you will ignore, they will go to someone else. Don’t ignore, give them the right answer.

#2 Be Patient while Listening

Making a conversation more of a lecture won’t be fruitful. Just for the sake of answering, you cannot hush them for speaking before they ask another question.

Let them know you’re all ears to them. Hear them out.

Try to understand their state of mind.
After listening, first ask about their opinion, their reasons, judgments.

In this way, you will get a gist of how much they know, what’s their stance on the matter and how you need to form your answer.
Make it a two-way conversation, rather than a one-way lecture.

#3 Encourage and Appreciate their Curiosity

There would be instances when you feel that the topic is not to be discussed with children; it might be too offensive or negative.

In that case, don’t be furious with them for having questions.

Instead, compose your thoughts and explain why they need not worry about such things for now, why it’s not relevant right now.

Ensure them that you will get back to them on that thing when it’s the “right time”.
Don’t forget to tap their back for being so observant of the things around.

#4 Give the Age-Appropriate Answers

Questions won’t ever stop coming in their head. Eventually, they will come to you to clarify the doubts. It’s your job now to gauge the amount of detail you should pour in the child’s mind.

Suppose your 3 years old asks you about where babies come from.

Don’t hesitate or panic. Just say they grow in mommy’s belly. But hey, if it’s a five or six years old, they will ask how they come out. Awkward.

No problem, add some more detail. Tell them that babies travel through the birth canal and come out of the vagina (It can be difficult but consider this).

If it’s your 10 years old asking the question, make it clear with the “birds and bees game”.
This way, your answers can be age-appropriate and composed.

#5 Be Honest, Don’t Lie to Let Go

Your children believe in you. It’s your responsibility to stay true to the belief they hold in you.

Be it any question, maybe related to sex, death, science, anatomy, or racism, just be honest and speak the truth.

If you lie, they might feel betrayed and refrain from asking you questions anymore. Children find out the right reason anyway. They might discuss those things with their friends in their get-togethers.

If you can’t answer the question at the moment, or cannot fabricate the answer, ask politely for some time. But don’t lie to let it go.

#6 Stay Calm and Composed with your Reactions

Generally, when we hear questions related to anatomy or the body structures, we get bemused and may react inappropriately. Instead, stay calm and composed with your thoughts, and answer smartly.

Don’t let them feel you’re uncomfortable with the question.

To Be in Your Children’s Memories Tomorrow, You Have to Be in Their Lives Today

So let these tips help you.

Children are the flowers of our society, we need to nourish them. You are the one they look up to for everything. Let this faith sustain. Answering difficult questions of your children isn’t that difficult.

Be tactful. Keep the little things in mind.

We encourage you to share similar experiences you had with your kid in the comments section below.

Happy Parenting.

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  • R*****
    Helpful article. Thanks sheroes team.Looking forward for articles on positive parenting.
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